I can’t believe that the holidays are almost here! They are so exciting and yet so challenging for those who grieve and are in the stage of finding hope after loss. I have been writing about my journey after losing my husband Mike of 49 years in Finding Joy After Grief, Finding Faith in Difficult Times, and Finding Happiness After Grief . This story is about spotting some hopeful glimmers that can occasionally shine bright enough to illuminate a brand new path.
Funny, but true…Comic Book Adventures as a Child
When I was nine or ten, I loved to perch on the bottom shelf of the magazine rack and read the “funny books” while Mother shopped for groceries. No matter how uneasy the school day may have been, sharing the comic adventures of my favorite characters turned stress into jest. Casper’s need for friendship resonated with me.
Poor little Richie Rich dealt with unexpected difficulties, and Arc
hie and the gang always found themselves in a pickle. Each story brought companionship, validation, and humor into the late childhood transition years of an awkward, dyslexic tweenager. My gait back to the back of the car and beyond was bouncier and my heart lighter. The endorphins released by my favorite comic characters reset my brain long enough to see a silver glint of hope. The smile and hug my mother gave me when I helped her put up the groceries surely didn’t hurt anything, either.
A time for everything…My Journey to Finding Hope After Loss
The events of the last year have certainly driven home to me the truth in Solomon’s words. “For everything there is a season, and a time for everything under Heaven…a time to weep, and a time to laugh…” It has certainly been our family’s time to weep this year. God has been vigilant, though, to create situations for me that increase that miraculous flow of endorphins. Take for example the Hallmark scene I was blessed to witness at our family Christmas table last year. Together, my immediate family all bowed our heads and clasped hands to pray for Mike in Heaven and for each other. I will never forget the honest tenderness shared at Mycah’s beautiful table that evening. There was hilarious laughter emanating from my grandchildren when they finally got to come over to play with their toys toward the end of Snowmageddon. There was also a huge relief that we were fortunate to have survived (and so did our pipes and Lacey’s bakery business).
Family and Friends Provide Essential Smiles and Emotional Support
Joy broke through the cracks as Emily read her first chapter book, volleyed tennis balls successfully, and achieved her first aerial. My heart jumped when Gus hit his first baseballs, recited his poems without mistake, and earned his belts in karate. The girls, grandkids, and I gasped at the wonders of Dinosaur State Park and the American Girl Doll store for the first time. (We also sighed with tremendous relief when Gus was found after disappearing in the American Girl Doll Store.)
I have spent hours sharing conversations and movies with my daughters, Lacey and Mycah. Grand celebrations and the smallest talk amongst and between myself and the dearest of friends have provided essential smiles and emotional support. Each conversation has tightened heartstrings shared with friends old and new.
My family and I have been blessed beyond measure with messages, cards, meals, and countless prayers and gestures of love that have definitely added to finding hope after loss. I have viewed watercolor sunrises and sunsets as well as glimpsed the autumnal colors of the leaves dancing to the ground. The petals of daffodils, tulips, sunflowers, morning glories, honeysuckles, and chrysanthemums unraveled spectacularly right before my eyes. I have been able to walk under shade trees and breathe in the fresh air.
Finding Hope After Loss in the Simplest of Things
Sumptuous cookies, spicy chili, and mouth-watering shrimp boils graced my tables. Each night I have slept on a soft, warm bed near family and friends. I have been able to spend time in devotional study to learn and to listen. In fact, there are hundreds of entries in my praise journal this year and thousands upon thousands of unspoken praises. And now, with another Christmas season turning the corner, we can eagerly anticipate the most special birth of history. We will celebrate again the birth of Jesus whose Spirit welcomed Mike and so many others into eternity this year. Hope is real and as bright as the original Christmas star. We have only to look up when finding hope after loss.
Please join me next time when I will write about Finding Purpose After Loss.
Have a wonderful, hope-filled holiday!
